Sunday, February 15, 2009

What would first graders say......

1s grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!

1.Don't change horses... until they stop running.

2. Strike while the... bug is close.

3. It's always darkest before... Daylight Saving Time.

4.Never underestimate the power of... termites.

5. You can lead a horse to water but... How?

6. Don't bite the hand tha... looks dirty.

7. No news is... impossible

8. A miss is as good as a... Mr.

9. You can't teach an old dog new... Math

10. If you lie down with dogs, you'll stink in the morning.

11. Love all, trust... Me.

12. The pen is mightier than the... pigs.

13.An idle mind is... the best way to relax.

14. Where there's smoke there's... pollution.

15. Happy the bride who... gets all the presents.

16. A penny saved is... not much.

17. Two's company, three's... the Musketeers.

18. Don't put off till tomorrow what... you put on to go to bed.

19. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and... You have to blow your nose.

20. There are none so blind as... Stevie Wonder.

21. Children should be seen and no... spanked or grounded.

22. If at first you don't succeed... get new batteries.

23. You get out of something only what you... See in the picture on the box

24. When the blind lead the blind... get out of the way.

25. A bird in the hand... is going to poop on you.

And the WINNER and last one!
26. Better late than... Pregnant

Here's the best thing I've read about the Economic Stimulus Plan:

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One
> is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota.
> All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. The Minnesota
> contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some
> figures with a pencil. "Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about
> $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me."
> The Tennessee contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "
> I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100
> profit for me."
> The Chicago contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the
> White House official and whispers, "$2,700."
> The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other
> guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?"
> The Chicago contractor whispers back, "$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we
> hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence."
> "Done!" replies the government official.
> And that, my friends, is how the new stimulus plan will work.


At 11:59 PM, Blogger Marla said...

That was so funny, I had a really good laugh!

At 11:13 AM, Blogger Big Dave T said...

Yeah I remember seeing that one, "Better late than pregnant" and wondered what six-year-old would understand the meaning there. Then again, they were talking on the radio this morning about this 15-year-old girl in England who is pregnant by her 13-year-old boyfriend. And they said he may not be the father; it could be one of his 13-year-old friends.
Kids grow up too quickly nowadays for my taste.

At 12:44 PM, Blogger Oh great One said...

Ha! Stimulus shmimulus.

I'm afraid. Very afraid.

At 9:03 PM, Blogger Jamie Dawn said...

Funny joke!

I like the one kid who said A penny saved... is not much.
Ain't that the truth!

I hope your Valentine's Weekend was sweet.

At 12:25 AM, Blogger Jess said...

Great post..I've been missing you!

Have a wonderful week

At 11:20 AM, Blogger Putz said...

i love the one none so blind as stvie wonder, i like jess miss you too lucu


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