Tuesday, January 10, 2006

The pain of discipline or the pain of regret…..

I went to a training meeting last night for my business and learned quite a bit about ways to obtain our goals. Tracy Jarvis, got up at the end of the meeting to do the close and she talked about a book that she had recently read called, “The Slight Edge” by Jeff Olson. She asked us the question: Are you living with the pain of discipline or the pain of regret? She went on the give an example.

She and Mark, her husband, had been out of town and returned home late the night before. She set her alarm clock for 6:00am., because she knew she needed to get some things done in the morning. When 6:00am. quickly arrived she decided that she needed to sleep in, she was tired and she just wanted to sleep. She rolled over and turned off the alarm. She said that she couldn’t go back to sleep, she lay there thinking about all the things that she had to do. Tracy said, I just couldn’t get my arm to pull the covers back and throw that leg out of the bed, I was frozen. Finally around 7:00am. she pulled herself out of bed. She missed out on getting some things done that she knew were important. Her mind asked her the question, “Are you living with the pain of discipline or the pain of regret”?

The book she had read talked about the little things we can do every day to live with discipline and not regret. We set our goals but what do we do to obtain them? We have to be consistent. I have made up my mind that I will do the “little things” it takes to obtain my goals and dreams for 2006. Isn’t it funny that we hear things all the time about how to do what we want, but one little sentence can hit us smack in the face and really make an impact. Tracy made an impact on me last night. I am going to go to the book store and buy the book and read it to learn more.

I have to admit that 2005 was a good year. I got a new grandbaby, learned how to care for new born puppies, I started a blog, and other things. But I didn’t obtain the goals that I had set for myself. There are goals that did not become a reality. I will do better this year and live with the pain of discipline and not the pain of regret….

Tip of the Day: Resolutions to lose weight? Heres how:

Perfect Winter Beef Stew: http://www.kraftfoods.com/main.aspx?s=recipe&m=recipe/knet_recipe_display&recipe_id=90514&e=email


At 11:18 AM, Blogger Wenchypoo said...

Hey Lucy--I think I wil check this book out as well. It sounds interesting, and the difference in "pains" would likely make for interesting blog fodder.

I think I may be living with both pains simultaneously--the pain of self-discipline, and the pain of my husband's as-of-yet unforeseen lack of discipline.

At 11:49 AM, Blogger Running2Ks said...

Cheers--and hoping that you have more discipline pains.

Sometimes, though, the path we thought we wanted morphs into something else, that could change our journey. You may have made some beautiful discoveries last year you wouldn't have otherwise found--had you not strayed a bit :)

At 12:08 PM, Blogger Paul said...

Interesting concept. I'll remember it the next time I wake up at 6 am with a list of goals for the day.

Cheers, Paul

At 12:34 PM, Blogger puremood said...

Thankfully, I don't have any regrets of 2005. :)

At 2:27 PM, Blogger Bar Bar A said...

Thanks, Lucy this was excellent and very motivating. And thanks for the comments you left at my place!

At 4:22 PM, Blogger Michelle said...

Great post Lucy. You are spot on when you say to write a list of small goals....these can be achieveable and then we don't feel like failures because they are within our limit. Perhaps also have another list with higher goals but tell ourselves that this list is one that will take that bit longer.

At 6:54 PM, Blogger Lucy Stern said...

wenchypoo - Thanks for stopping by.

running 2ks - I don't think I missed anything, I just think I could have done a lot better with set goals.

Glad you stopped by Paul - We will both work on the discipline part.

Puremood - Glad you achieved your goals and have no regrets.

well woman - I enjoy visiting your blog. You always have good things to say. I enjoy reading about your son.

michelle - I do think smaller goads are easier to keep.

At 8:07 PM, Blogger Fred said...

I like this very much. I don’t set huge goals for any particular year, rather, I look at where I want to be in five or six years, then tweak it as I go along.

2005 sounds like a great year for you. Here's to a great 2006, Lucy.

At 8:19 PM, Blogger Danny Sims said...

Wonderful distinction. I live with both.

Yesterday I went 14 miles on my bike. It was the pain of discipline for sure, but regreat that there was so much pain!


At 8:28 PM, Blogger vani said...

thanks for visiting my blog! thinking about it more and more, i think most of us do live with the pain of regret, at least i do. it's a good thing to think about with the new year at hand. also- i just made a batch of beef stew last week- it was a hit!!! :)

At 8:50 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

i think you have to set realistic goals. sometimes things get in the way of you achieving your goals, like caring for a little of pups. something completely unexpected, yet look at what you achieved within yourself by doing it. some of the things we do without setting goals are worth even more.

At 9:01 PM, Blogger Keshi said...

**I will do better this year and live with the pain of discipline and not the pain of regret….

good on ya Lucy!

I dun have regrets for 2003 but I do have regrets...


At 9:59 PM, Blogger Lucy Stern said...

keshi, Don't worry about the past, you can not change it. Work for today and for your future.

At 10:12 PM, Blogger Lucy Stern said...

Fred, I think we have to write down our goals and put them somewhere that we can see them. Huge goals that are out of reach are just a waste of time. Here's to a great 2006.

Danny, Fourteen miles? Are you crazy. Every muscle in my body would be in pain if I peddled 14 miles...That was definately a pain of discipline.

vani - Beef stew is so good, especially in the winter months. WE all need to stop worring about our regrets and focus on the vision ahead.

BSTS - Yes, things can get in the way of achieving our goals, like the illness of a parent. Two years before my dad died, he had a major heart attack. He came to live with us for three months before he wanted to go home. My whole life was watching over my family and taking care of dad. I would do it again in a heart beat, if I had too. I am the only one of his children that didn't have a job outside of the house and I was nominated to take care of him. I would have done it anyway. These are the types of things that do get in the way of our goals, but are just as important. What's the line from Mr. Hollands Opus, "Life is what happens on the way to our dreams." So true!

At 12:28 AM, Blogger Mountain Mama said...

The recipe sounds like a nice one for a cold winter night.

At 4:31 AM, Blogger Live, Love, Laugh said...

I think I am living with both!!

Hey the book is A Million Little Pieces by James Frey.

At 6:58 PM, Blogger Big Dave T said...

I think I saw a quote somewhere that said the pain of discipline heals, but the pain of regret lingers. Something like that anyway.

Hope you have a good 2006. I'm suffering the pain of discipline presently, as dieting is something I'm doing right now--one of my goals for this year.

At 7:13 PM, Blogger Lucy Stern said...

Mountain Mama - I love eating stew on a cold winters night. Chile is the second runner up.

Live, love and laugh - Thanks, I'll get it at the book store along with two other books I want to get.

Big Dave - I love that statement, it goes right along with the one Tracy gave. You and I are both holding that pain of discipline with our diets. I am eating a low carb diet, it seems to work best for me. We can wish each other luck.

At 11:09 PM, Blogger Lavender Dawn said...

While I have mad e vast improvements over the years to live with the pain of discipline rather than regret, I have far from flung this from my ife. I am just a little bit better at it than before. I do not set goals so that I cannot fail at them. I just try to live day by day, remembering to be nice to the kids and to take a shower. Cleaning the house is on that list, too. I really notice this most when my husband is gone, because I tend to slip into a funk and cannot function. so I try harder when he is away because I am capable of doing these things for me and not jsut for his approval. That worked well for getting me to the point where I am, but now I must grow up some more and move on. I still won't think of this as a goal or resolution, it is just the way things are going to have to be. Thanks for posting this topic, btw. I needed the reminder.

At 9:32 AM, Blogger Pragmatician said...

Wise conclusion, most people have more ideas and ambitions that are actually possible to accomplish without neglecting everyone and everything else around them. Indeed it would be regrettably unpragmatic to regret the things that couldn't be accomplished.

At 5:37 PM, Blogger Mitey Mite said...

I like that a lot. It puts things in the right perspective.

Can't think what group -- maybe The Beatles? -- had a line "Life is what happens while you're making other plans."

At 11:41 PM, Blogger Jennifer Meachem said...

hey, do you know who lloyd and shirley redd are? just wondering.

At 7:41 AM, Blogger Lucy Stern said...

dawn marie - we all need the reminder. I have always been told that you need to write your goals down, and post them somewhere that you see them every day. Only 10% of people who do not post there goals ever achieve them. So, write down what you want to accompolish and put them on the frig, or the bathroom mirror. I think the old addage of out of sight, out of mind fits here. Good luck.

prag - I totally agree.

mity mite - your quote is more accurate than mine. We all make our plans when we start out in life. As the years pass, we seem to make all kinds of twists and turns. I wonder how many change there plans or just don't achieve them.

jennifer - I have never heard of them. Who are they?


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